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#ConfessYourChurchMess Best of Messy Grace faith Messy Grace Millennials Religious Recovery Spirituality The Struggle With Church

Why I’m Trying Out Church Again for the First Time

“I suppose that since most of our hurts come through relationships, so will our healing, and I know that grace rarely makes sense for those looking in from the outside.”-Wm. Paul YoungDead InsideFor a while now, my Christian friends have laughed (or cringed) at my response to theological talk. I usually say something like, “I […]

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Anxiety Best of Messy Grace Depression faith Mental Health

Suicide, the Woman at the Well, & You

What does suicide have to do with the woman at the well? And how can this story help you?

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Best of Messy Grace faith Family Marriage Recovery Religious Recovery The Struggle With Church

6 Mistakes When Reading about Women in the Bible

The false teaching that idolizes men, while subordinating and harming women has been allowed to run rampant in the Church in the name of “Biblical Gender Roles” for too long. This teaching reduces women to objects created by God as an afterthought to please and take care of men. It blames women when men lust […]

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#ConfessYourChurchMess Best of Messy Grace faith Messy Grace Millennials Recovery Religious Recovery The Struggle With Church

The Truth about Millennials and Church

“Only those who recognize the extent of their wounds and their wounding can be made well.”-Rachel Held Evans,  Searching for SundayI’m a 30-something Millennial, and a former pastor. Most folks would assume that combination would make me pretty cynical. For a while, they would have been right. While I was railing against toxic people and […]

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#ConfessYourChurchMess Best of Messy Grace faith Messy Grace Recovery Religious Recovery The Struggle With Church

Christianity: My ‘but’ always gets in the way…

Growing up in the Bible Belt, life seemed fairly simple – you were either “sinner” or “saint”, Alabama or Auburn, Republican or Democrat – Christian or not. But these days, I’m not so sure. Nothing is certain. And that isn’t just the biggest part of my church struggle, it’s the biggest part of my faith […]

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#ConfessYourChurchMess faith Recovery Religious Recovery The Struggle With Church

No, You Don’t Have to Go to Church. Here’s Why…

“It isn’t necessary that we stay in church in order to remain in God’s presence. We can make our hearts personal chapels where we can enter anytime to talk to God privately. These conversations can be so loving and gentle, and anyone can have them” Brother Lawrence You Don’t Have to Go to Church I suppose I […]

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#ConfessYourChurchMess faith Recovery Religious Recovery The Struggle With Church

What if My Church Mess is All in My Head?

I don’t know about you, but I have a vivid imagination. So much so that I can create heartache where there isn’t any. If you Googled the term “negative forecasting”, I think you’d see my headshot.   I come about this trait honestly as I have been dealt a pretty crappy hand and the fallout […]

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faith Mental Health Recovery Religious Recovery The Struggle With Church

Self-Care for Church Workers. Step One: Breathe.

Ten years of ministry really took a toll on me. I’m not supposed to admit that, right? But it’s the truth. And it’s about more than just the politics of religion. It’s not just about the back door meetings or the working to appease the tiny group of members that makes up the largest number […]

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Best of Messy Grace faith Recovery Religious Recovery The Struggle With Church

It Really Sucks to be a Christian Right Now

I don’t like being a Christian today. Actually, I should say, I don’t like most Christians today. Wait. What I really mean is, I don’t want to fight with Christians anymore. I was once a youth pastor, a speaker, a worship leader, an avid blogger, and a radio host. Everything that entered my brain was […]

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Best of Messy Grace faith Messy Grace Recovery Religious Recovery The Struggle With Church

9 Ways to Know if You’re in an Oppressive Church

For many people I know, Christianity has been boiled down to morality. It has become a way to ensure you skip eternal damnation. It’s a list of do’s and don’ts, but there is no real freedom. Many Christians have traded the yoke of slavery for the yoke of religion, and both are dead.